Monday, August 2, 2010
peew.... my heart has been flying and sinking nowadays...
ah, anyway this blog has more ppl reading now haha....
yeah o ya wanxin, of cuz this blog is where i talk to myself, of cuz will know more bout me.. so tell me urs eh? haha nvm if u dun feel like telling...
anyway music really rocks! need to have music when studying to concentrate, need to have music to relax, need to have music to let thoughts run wild.. ah music rocks!
nowadays, i keep having the urge to play Ragnarok... i am referring to Ragnarok Online, and the comic sketch on my blogskin is actually a sketch on ragnarok character, and yeah they really looks like this in the game, thats why it is awesome!!
some ask if i really keep this blog, yeah i always keep it, i have like 6-7 dead ones tho... haha those 6-7 blogs were created when i was feeling very sad or down and then it is used to rant my frustrations there....
nowadays i also keep asking around the rating of who and who... haha so fun... ppl tot i playing game -.- but anyway by asking around i can know who is more attractive in terms of character and all... well i am not that bad afterall.. ppl rate me on average 7, i always tot i am around 3... bleh.. but since taking account into them not wanting to hurt my feeling, my actualy rating is about 5-6? yeah about there... well not bad already... if u wan to know other ppl in s19, ask me privately.. haha ^^
yeah, i mentioned that been feeling lots of ups and lots of down too... well been feeling down cuz i realised all the friends i have is at most only this close, i dun really have a super close, or what they call a true friend... some say one may not find a true friend the whole lifetime, some say it only depends on urself... hmm maybe my true friend will be my wife, but o well i have one know, tho he cant talk... he is gougou!! the dotted dog on my desk! he is made of cotton and some fur which doesnt drop, u can even breathe in with the body stuck to ur nose and no hair will go in!! muahaha! and it is also made with pails and pails of tears, 98% sadness, 2% happiness... well thats my past...
yeah been feeling down also cuz today mum was very not tactful with her words... there is this class fund thing in my class... then everytime we have to collect $50 to fund up the class fund... well u know even if it is JC money is needed to buy books, i know poly need more money... but that doesnt mean JC need no money...
i even spent all my savings to fund up the class fund, as in my part only, i tot 吃哑巴亏(sacrifice a little without saying out) everyone will be happier... but no! exact opposite!! dam it all! cuz i used to use my own money to buy my notes, then when i run out of my own savings which is suppose to be used to buy the items i wished for very long.... then when i run out of money, and i ask her for money, i tot she will gladly give, but no! she keep asking and all... she even seriously suspect i would use the money to play or buy cigarretes and all... wtf! just cuz my bro is a genius doesnt mean i am, i also need to put in effort to get into a jc from a freaking lousy sch with freaking bad influence... i am glad i didnt become a geek or gangster from that sch... and yet she accuse my despite my effort and my goodwill... then of cuz the very straightforward me shouted back, and then i went to bath and all... but i feel guilty afterwards... cuz she is caring afterall.. she is my mother afterall.. but of cuz not that guilty now after saying all out here..(maybe thats why i havent gone crazy despite everything)
yeah i also mentioned i been feeling great, thats cuz there is more and more music around me... o ya, HATE IT WHEN PPL JUST ASK ME SHUT UP WHEN I JUST STARTED SINGING! fuck off! u mean only ppl who sing well get to sing? then i might as well be a singer.. for god sake singing is a form of entertainment, just like some ppl like to joke, some ppl like to play games, same for singing... it is not like my singing sux so much that make u suffer... i also not taking ur happiness away from u when i sing... fuck off! yeah and my handphone really got good songs...
o ya near the corner is the WIll run, which just ended, freaking sucky... the stress i got when i run, aw... so i just keep running, i actually felt dizzy already.. but i just keep running, i already prepared to faint. the weather was so freaking hot... my muscle isnt listening to me.. this is my first time i walk while running cuz of muscle tired not cuz of breathlessness.... but really gotta thanks nurul, cheered really loud for me... maybe cuz imitating me? but o well a cheer is still a cheer, i appreciate it well..
hmm... i am blogging now cuz facebook dunno why cannot go in.... arghh.. but anyway test tomolo.. and tons of homework, just hope this week would past by quickly.. roar!!
and Mr Tan gave us this econs jotter book, comes with checklist, well looks nice and appreciate it! *checks price* wow $10... really a lot.. thanks Mr Tan!
anyways i will stop here... hope everything goes well for me in the future road... sleeping soon!
Cheers~
Zach
caught in the rain at 6:50 PM
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